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THE NEWSLETTER OF THE DOWEL
JUNE 11 2024
THE WORLD'S MOST POPULAR DOWEL RELATED NEWSLETTER!
Praise the Dowel!
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Greetings Dowel fans!
This month we are offering a two for one special on all Dowel news. We have TWO Dowels of the month, we feature TWO “thats weird” submissions, we have our second logo update in less than a year and apparently we are being investigated for “Double dipping” expenses on our Dowel tax return! All that and more in this months NEWSLETTER OF THE DOWEL! Praise the Dowel!
DOWEL(S) OF THE MONTH
Email us your photos of the Dowel - and we'll feature the best of them here. This month we have two feature Dowels in one photo!!
A fantastic photo that we think symbolises exactly what the Dowel stands for - strength through unity and thats why this is our "Dowel/Dowels of the month". And I agree with the submitter (A.Dowel) that we are a world power...
If you have a Dowel you would like to feature in our newsletter send us a photo via email – or text. NB: There is no prize awarded if your photo is selected as the Dowel of the month - all you win is our love and affection.
If you would like a specially made replica of this months “Dowel of the month” we have a limited supply to give away – again just email us with the subject line “I want that dreamy Dowel July 24”
Dowel Logo Update
You may have noticed we have updated our logo at the top of the page. The update brings colour to our logo and with a Dowel flying over a globe hints at our space bound future. Speaking of our space programme - progress on our launch mission has been slow to date - but we do now have a shiny new logo... so things are only going to speed up from here I imagine.
After the break!
Still to come - more Dowel news! Thats Weird! and our members update etc. etc.
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Have you ever seen the Matrix? Do you like the idea of being able to download jujitsu almost instantly? This book is like that but instead of downloading jujitsu - you are downloading everything you need to know about the Dowel. You will also learn more euphamisims for penis than you could ever need.
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Intermission:
More than 70% of people surveyed said their last encounter with a Dowel left them feeling warm and fuzzy on the inside.
Praise the Dowel!
That's Weird
Send us news of any weird stuff you come accross.
This month, a member sent us this sign without any further context,
The message is clear....
That's Weird Too
In our second entry this month - someone messaged a member with the following, which was forwarded on to us.
"There was a guy, who looked - without my Glasses on - like you Peter who wore a long coat and held a broom stick in one hand and a crow on his other arm and he just walked around slowly like this stopping from time to time in the middle of the road!" "It was so creepy! Josh and I woke up because the crows around the area were freaking out and screaming around (Grrrr Emoji). This was one of the weirdest things I've seen in London". The above has been faithfully recreated by our resident Dowel artist (below).
Now for context: (1) It wasnt a broom stick - it was a Dowel. (2) as long time readers of this newsletter will know - our research institute has been putting significant resource in to prooving that we can communicate to Crows through the Dowel and yes... progress on that is going quite well actually, as it turns out.
If you hear or see anything weird - make sure to let us know and our resident Dowel artist will make it look wonderful. If he so chooses to.
Members Update
I am thinking of bringing back the marriage announcement feature - so if you just happen to be getting married any time soon - and would like to anounce it publically, let us know. Actually - if anyone wants to write anything at all for this newsletter - let us know.
NEXT MONTH
Next month we explain why plastic Dowels arent really Dowels at all. All that and more - next month. Alternativelly I may take the entire month of Augest off - like the French do - I like the way they think.
Praise the Dowel -
P.
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www.praisethedowel.com
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